Negotiate and Win EDITION 2

The processes in this book developed out of emergency. The emergency was my very green introduction to one of the highest conflict industries of all - Industrial Relations. With almost no knowledge and little skill, I found myself as the Australian Army's Chief Industrial Officer.

Daily, I was confronted with conflict that arose between unions and management in army establishments all over Australia. The personal strain was enormous. I found myself drinking too much and suffering agonies of anxiety. I desperately wanted to win, and very often, I did not. The conflict was sometimes violent and verbal, sometimes a pale compromise that left all parties tired, dissatisfied, and dispirited. Gradually, from the deals that worked and even more from those that failed, I learned the rudiments of negotiation. The main aspects that influenced the results were information, style, phases, tactics, and the relationship between the parties. At the time, I made no effort to systematise these vague feelings. In fact, it was not until much later, looking back with surprise, that I noticed the emergency had passed and colleagues were seeking advice. I pieced together the scraps I had learned so I could pass them on to others. That exercise was precious for me, and I concluded that three elements were essential - phases, style and tactics. I discovered that Information is part of the Preparation phase and the Relationship between the parties was intrinsic to the Wants phase and also affected the Style of a negotiation. Tactics became an important but less vital section on its own.From work with a specific purpose in industrial relations, I explored the possibilities of this negotiation system. I realised that to take full advantage of a system that worked, I had to look for situations which were negotiable. To my surprise, nearly everything was negotiable. Negotiations occur in the domestic, social, and professional spheres of our lives. Almost any situation can be turned into a negotiation if you look for the variables where you have room to move. The first aim of this book is to encourage the reader to look beyond the face value of many situations and negotiate more purchases, requests, sales, and domestic or social conflicts. Look for the thousands of little negotiable opportunities that come up every week and practise. It is both instructive and fun. With hindsight I can see that:

Everybody negotiates to some degree every day.

People are good natural negotiators as children, and then they start to lose their skills.

There is no substitute for excellent negotiation skills training if you do not want to spend your life reinventing the wheel.

All the reading and training in the world will be wasted if you do not actively practise both in simulation sessions and in the crucible of the real world. Negotiation is a process that starts once one person wants to get something from another. It also implies that both parties have veto power over the other. In other words, both parties agree to co-operate.

Negotiation is the essence of the social contract that binds our various forms of society. As individuals we are weak and powerless compared to many other life forms. How did we become the predominant species in the world? It is not only our large and intelligent brain that sets us apart; an intellect is of little use when an individual is attacked by wild animals.

Negotiation is the only way we could have survived by banding together and by reliance on others to accomplish even the simplest tasks. None of us is capable of being the independent hero of a fictional world who relies on no-one else to conquer the evils of the day.